So Here's the Story...
Ok, If anyone has an opinion about the matter that I am about to discuss...Let me know (just be kind about it).
I am a single gay man. Tragic? NO...I like my life and where I am emotionally speaking. Would I like to have a boyfriend? Or even a date for that matter? YES! So, since the whole bar scene rally isn't my scene I have have put an Ad online. It was humiliating at first (IM not sure why) but I had the hardest time admitting that I couldn't get a date. All of that being said...Its not a big deal anymore. Well here is the problem. Well, not really a problem but more like a situation...
The guys that are on this site (not important which one) that are in my immediate area don't really excite me. On first impressions that is. Consequently, I have searched farther out. Like way out of my city to find someone. The problem is...I find them. Its not a bad thing but what could ever come of it. The guys that I have connected with have all been great. They just live FAR AWAY!!! Which brings me to the current situation at hand.
I have met someone. He is great. We talk for long periods of time about nearly anything. We haven't gone to the "sexy" side yet, but I feel it coming soon. He lives in Dallas which is nearly a 4 1/2 hour drive and that's one heck of a commute for a date. Is this something that I should be doing? Finding a guy that lives in my city would be ideal but it just hasn't happened. Well this guy in Dallas wants to come down and stay the weekend. I am torn in two about it. Do I let him come? Make him stay in a hotel? Or do I just throw the whole thing up in the air and see where everything lands?
I want to also say...I am NOT not looking here in Houston for someone. I am always eyes wide open looking. And the reason that I leave my "profile" on the site is so if I am out w/friends and someone recognizes me they know that I am not taken' and that I am available.
Am I overthinking this whole thing? Do I just need to throw caution into the wind and see what and where life takes me? Do I stop the conversations w/the new guy to prevent any heartache that a long distance thing would bring?
I just want some advice from you guys and to get another opinion on the matter that isn't my own. Thanks!
Until Next Time...
1 comment:
Okay, firstly...I think it would be a great idea for him to come for the weekend. If it's the first face to face meeting, then I would without a doubt recommend a room elsewhere and meet someplace other than your home on the first meeting...maybe a coffee house or the hotel...just as long as it would include being in a public place.
Secondly, if things work out during the first meeting, arrange to go visit him...on his "turf". Just remember to be very "street smart" and watch your back, both in Houston and Dallas. Then see how long the "back and forth" goes for a while...and the online/phone relationship.
Thirdly, don't commit to any sort of relationship. Agree to casually date other people while dating each other. Become friends first, then explore the options.
Lastly, don't go looking for love, but don't be a wallflower either. If the bar scene is not your thing, try volunteer work at the GLBT center, an AIDS charity, explore all of the "gay" social clubs...like bowling or softball, or as a last resort...MCC church.
Regardless in what you decide to do...please enjoy "being with yourself", first..., be safe, and most importantly have fun.
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